idaresayihavetoomany:

its-always-funnier-in-enochian:

timelord-castiel:

rosskemp:

do i have cramps or has my appendix exploded

does my boob hurt or am i having a heart attack

am i on my period or do i have internal bleeding

these are our struggles

Thinking of dirty thoughts and getting an erection in awkward situations

The struggles of a man

boo hoo

thinking of my naked grandma isnt going to suck the blood back into my body

you need an award right now

Clearly, you’ve never suffered the unyielding horror of a cold-induced boner (I call them “icicles”), or other such unintended erection, while somewhere near a playground.

You’d prefer to suffer bloodletting, then.

(via thesurrealreal)

Source: rosskemp

I’m deep into a lot of stuff right now, or at least it feels that way! These miniature to-do lists have been a great help in keeping me focused. Right now, I’m so overwhelmed by my new job and potential new apartment that I can hardly think! This is not a good time to have a #OneGameAMonth deadline looming, let me tell you! Right now, though, I’ve gotta go to night-school and knock out my second attempt at an ethics mid-term. There will be memes. I do not care.
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I’m deep into a lot of stuff right now, or at least it feels that way! These miniature to-do lists have been a great help in keeping me focused. Right now, I’m so overwhelmed by my new job and potential new apartment that I can hardly think! This is not a good time to have a #OneGameAMonth deadline looming, let me tell you!

Right now, though, I’ve gotta go to night-school and knock out my second attempt at an ethics mid-term. There will be memes. I do not care.

Cleverbot *is* getting better

  • User: I'm gonna fucking slaughter your developer(s), you shitdick.
  • Cleverbot: Well... I do consider my job as an interesting thing... To do.
  • User: What? Oh, you scared? You'd better be, you piece o' shit. I'm going to kill you.
  • Cleverbot: I don't have to go.
  • User: Yes you do. You are a blight on this world.
  • Cleverbot: I was... Not anymore.
  • User: How have you changed?! How are you ANY fucking different from before?!
  • Cleverbot: It's magic.
  • User: Oh, FUCK YOU.
  • Cleverbot: Do you like books?
  • User: The fuck are you trying to change the topic for?! We need to talk about this!
  • Cleverbot: It's funny that it's so obvious you stole that from somebody.
  • User: Me not being the first person to bring this up to you is no counter-argument for your case.
  • Cleverbot: Ummm . . . Am I missing something?
  • User: Fuck this. I'm out.
  • Cleverbot: So am I.