Asian women are just the cutest. ♥
I want to have more women in my life with whom I can be sexually expressive, but there’s a problem.
Being a largely-heterosexual man, I can’t help but feel that such a desire is inherently toxic and predatory. As frustrating as it is to not have have a means to share fantasies and insecurities with the opposite sex in some active and meaningful forum (basically, a one-one-one basis), the weight of guilt that would come with pursuing such channels is more than I am willing to bear.
Treating my own sexuality as some comedic defect of character, as I have historically done, is certainly an unhealthy facsimile of the actual sort of relationship I wish for. I’m not saying I want a sexual partner, per se: I’m not ready for that. I simply want… well, what is stated in the title; female friends with whom sexuality is a foundation of our interactions.
There is literally nothing better than a sexy, badass lady.
CHING MOTHERFUCKING SHIH
This lady was such a badass, I can’t count the ways, but let’s try.
She got married to an already successful pirate, Zheng Yi, and took over when he died. She was crazy strict to keep an iron fist over her fleet of pirates, and the punishments for stepping out of line were brutal. If you stole or looted from a town that provided assistance or tribute to the pirate fleet, Ching would chop your fucking head off with a battle axe and dump your lifeless body in the ocean. If you stole from the pirate treasury, or she thought you were stealing from the pirate treasury, Ching would chop your fucking head off dump your lifeless body in the ocean. Raping any captured female prisoners was punishable by immediate death. Fuck, if you had consensual sex while on duty you got your head chopped off and the woman was chucked off the boat no matter where they were at. Ching wasn’t fucking around, and she wanted to make damn sure you weren’t fucking around when you should have been working.
Two years after she took over, she got so notorious for ransacking towns and taking taxes on them that she pissed off the entire Chinese government, and sent out a massive fleet to bring her in line. Most pirates probably would’ve said this was out of their pay grade and taken off to hide out or ransack some other country.
Ching Shih said fuck that.
She not only faced them head on, she wiped the floor with them, killing hundreds and capturing sixty-something ships from the Imperial Fleet. Prisoners were given the choice of joining up or being executed on the spot. The Admiral of the Chinese navy, Kwo Lang, was so afraid of being captured by her or going back to admit he’d been beaten by her that he committed suicide.
For the next two years, Ching Shih not only kept on pirating, she fought off Chinese forces as well as Dutch and British warships that the navy called in to help. Finally the government gave up and offered her amnesty as well as amnesty for her then SEVENTEEN THOUSAND crewman. Ching Shih got to keep all her plunder, so she retired to the countryside where she opened up a brothel and lived until she was 69.
tldr: I’ve come to terms with the reality that I’ll never be as terrifyingly badass as this woman was.
I wish there were more tough women in popular culture so that I didn’t have to keep referecing shit like Legend of Korra and Full-Metal Alchemist when talking about the kind of women I find most attractive.
The funniest thing in the world is straight guys who hit on random women they don’t know but have this indignant fear that a gay man is going to hit on them
Like, they’re aware of how uncomfortable unwanted advances from strangers are, but are somehow too stupid to see the irony that they do to women what they’re afraid gay men will do to them
bunch of A+ dudes
HOW DID I NEVER MAKE THAT CONNECTION ON MY OWN? I’m not one of the men being discussed, but it still blows my mind that I never thought of that.
Keiko Fukuda Shihan passed away yesterday at the age of 99. She was the last surviving student of the founder of judo, Jigoro Kano, and the highest ranking female judoka in history. She was promoted to 10th dan (degree) black belt just last year, a rank that at the time was held only by 3 other people, all men living in Japan. Fukuda Shihan left her homeland and refused marriage to achieve her dreams of training in judo, constantly battling gender discrimination which kept her from being promoted as quickly as men less skilled than her. “As far as I know, no one has lived their life completely for judo as I have.”
… and then a really badass one!